How Alike Are You and Your Mum?

This quiz answers that question trait by trait. You might have her way of noticing who needs a cup of tea before they ask, and still be completely different when it comes to planning a holiday. Personality is handed down in pieces, and this quiz shows you which pieces you got.

It compares the two of you on five traits: openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness and emotional sensitivity. Those are the five traits of the Big Five, the model used in personality research, so you are comparing what genuinely makes up a personality, not just shared habits.

The result is a side-by-side picture of where you match and where you split. It is quick enough to do over a cup of tea, and interesting enough to keep you talking long after the cup is empty.

Most families have a running theory about who takes after whom. This quiz tests it. Sometimes it confirms what every aunt has said at every family gathering. Sometimes it shows that the child everyone calls "the image of her mum" is actually her opposite on the trait that matters most.

You take it first, then send your mum a link. She answers the same ten questions on her own phone, whenever suits her. Once you have both finished, you both see the comparison.

Neither of you sees what the other tapped. You see how close you are on each trait, not how she answered "I can be blunt to the point of rudeness". That keeps the answers honest and the conversation afterwards friendly.

It works for anyone you call mum: a stepmum, a nan who brought you up, or a mother-in-law, if you are feeling bold.

Your headline result is the trait the two of you share most. It can be any of these five.

• Openness: you share the same curiosity about new ideas, places and food, or the same comfort in the familiar. Either way, you will pick the same restaurant.
• Conscientiousness: you handle plans and promises the same way. Both of you have the birthday cards bought in advance, or both of you are writing them in the car.
• Extraversion: you have the same social battery. You both chat to strangers in the queue, or you both quietly enjoy a night in.
• Agreeableness: you approach people the same way, both quick to make everyone welcome or both happy to say exactly what you think.
• Emotional sensitivity: you react to stress the same way, both unflappable or both feeling things deeply and spotting trouble early.

Your result also shows the trait where you are furthest apart, which is usually the one behind your most familiar family debates.

We use our own proprietary structure: the short Big Five block, two statements for each of the five traits. For each trait we compare your answers with your mum's and turn the gap into a similarity score from 0 to 100.

The trait with the highest similarity is the one you share most, and that is the line you can share publicly. The one with the lowest similarity is where you differ most, and it stays on your results page.

Partly, yes. Personality comes from a mix of what you are born with and how you grow up, and your mum usually contributes to both. Some of what you share came with you, and some you picked up from years of watching how she handled a missed train, a difficult neighbour or a house full of guests.

That is why the overlap can surprise you in both directions. You might share her habit of worrying about everyone else first without either of you ever mentioning it. Or you might be her opposite on planning because you grew up with lists on the fridge and decided spontaneity was more your style.

This quiz does not try to untangle the two. It simply shows where you have both ended up, side by side, as adults. That is usually the more interesting question: not where a trait came from, but what it is like to share it now.

Take both quizzes and you will know. Send this one to your mum and the dad version to your dad, then compare the two results side by side.

Most people find they take after one parent on some traits and the other on the rest. You might have your mum's warmth with strangers and your dad's habit of worrying about the weather. Seeing it laid out trait by trait is far more interesting than the usual family verdict of "you are your mother's daughter" or "you are your mother's son".

Talk about them. The trait you share most is a lovely starting point for stories: the times you both rescued a family occasion, or both wanted to leave the party at the same moment. The trait where you differ most explains a lot of old friction, and naming it makes it easier to laugh about. Asking "were you always like this?" about a trait you share often opens up stories you have never heard before.

It also makes a good gift for Mother's Day or a birthday: a few minutes each and a conversation you will both remember. If you want the full picture of your own personality afterwards, take the full Big Five test. It uses fifty questions instead of ten and gives you a detailed profile on all five traits.